eureka!
last night as i changed out of my work clothes and into my sleep clothes, as i stood in the middle of my bedroom wearing nothing but a purple polka dot bra, which didnt my red panties, and mismatched socks, i had a revelation!
i am single! yes yes yes…i already knew that, but all of a sudden the grey clouds that sit around that awful word parted and in came the sunlight. the sunlight that set months ago after the luster around my single girl status faded.
there was no boyfriend sitting there in my room wondering why my choices in under garments didnt look anything like what alessandra, Heidi, and Miranda pranced down the runway in?
no boyfriend eyeing my winter white pale skin and post holiday belly bulge.
no boyfriend there! i didnt have to pull out my sexy pajamas or cute pants that make my ass look good, or sit on my hips just right. stress free!
i smiled and i dug through my drawers intentionally looking for the most ridiculous out fit i could find.
a Christmas gift from some insane relative—a brown and baby blue fleece long sleeved hooded pull over DRESS! i kid you not. the most heinous article of clothing i have ever owned. the words ‘peace’ and ‘happiness’ are printed every which way with smiley faces and peace signs adding that extra pizzaz! 2 brown pom pom type things dangle off the hood. i looked like i was wearing a trash bag from the limited too circa 1997. it was awesome.
it was awesome to know that i didnt have a potential husband sitting there patiently waiting for me to emerge from my bathroom in a sexy little number. i could dress as awful as i wanted to because I AM SINGlE!
peace and happiness to that my friends. peace and mother fucking happiness!
Um, I’m pretty sure I’m going to need a picture of the aforementioned fleecey-dress thing. Please.
